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Man Robs Brothel, Loses Thumb:
Via drudge:
  A man was ordered to be held without bail after police tied him to a recent armed robbery. But at least he has his thumb back.
  Police said Bryan Perez, 22, and an accomplice made off with hundreds of dollars in cash in an Oct. 11 raid at an alleged brothel in Washington's Columbia Heights neighborhood. According to charging documents, one of the victims took control of Perez's silver machete during a struggle and hacked off his right thumb.
I guess it was a four finger discount.
Arkady:
Rule of thumb violation.
10.22.2008 5:11pm
A Law Dawg:
Silver machete? Perfect for defense against those lycanthropic muggers.
10.22.2008 5:18pm
geokstr:
Here comes the wrongful defense with a deadly weapon prosecution of the hooker, the civil lawsuit for $150 million against the brothel, and the call by the Obama Supremacy to ban all sharp implements over 3 mm long in...3...2...1

Although it's doubtful that either defendant will have enough resources to pay the settlement, so I guess the victim and his army of lawyers will have to take it out in trade.
10.22.2008 5:19pm
A Law Dawg:
Although it's doubtful that either defendant will have enough resources to pay the settlement, so I guess the victim and his army of lawyers will have to take it out in trade.


Or melt the machete and take it in specie.
10.22.2008 5:20pm
Houston Lawyer:
Nothing in the article implied that the victim who took the machete was one of the hookers. If you rob a horny man in a whore house, you might expect that he'd react negatively. Should have kept the thumb for a souvenir.
10.22.2008 5:27pm
SFC B (mail) (www):
It's probably not the first time they gave a discount for only four fingers.
10.22.2008 5:32pm
JK:
You really haven't lived until you defend a brothel with a silver machete.
10.22.2008 5:50pm
Dilan Esper (mail) (www):
Is he barred from recovery by the doctrine of unclean thumbs?
10.22.2008 6:01pm
Hoosier:
I appreciated the last line of the extract. Up to then, I was picturing what his thumb might have gotten caught in . . .
10.22.2008 6:02pm
LarryA (mail) (www):
Police said Bryan Perez, 22, and an accomplice made off with hundreds of dollars in cash in an Oct. 11 raid at an alleged brothel in Washington's Columbia Heights neighborhood.
But I thought prostitution was illegal. Did the police get a list of johns witnesses? Anyone famous? Enquiring minds want to know.
Nothing in the article implied that the victim who took the machete was one of the hookers.
True. Hookers know which appendage a machete is for.

Was the machete licensed?
10.22.2008 6:27pm
Bored at work:
It was in a brothel; he should be glad he only lost a thumb.
10.22.2008 6:32pm
Al Maviva:
Anyone famous?

In Washington Heights? Not bloody likely.
10.22.2008 6:45pm
Dilan Esper (mail) (www):
In Washington Heights? Not bloody likely.

Apparently you have forgotten that Hugh Grant once ended up with Divine Brown.
10.22.2008 7:09pm
CamarilloBrillo (mail):
According to an arrest affidavit, a doctor told police the thumb "fits like a puzzle piece."



If the thumb do not fit, you must acquit!
10.22.2008 7:23pm
spool32 (mail):
This sounds like the plot for a Tarantino movie...
10.22.2008 7:27pm
Rodger Lodger (mail):
Did the police need 4th Amendment justification to seize and print the thumb? Doesn't sound like it was abandoned property. If the police can search our severed body parts at will, where are our rights of privacy?
10.22.2008 7:34pm
Obvious (mail):
They'll get MY thumb when they pry it from my cold, dead hand!
10.22.2008 7:43pm
Someone too dignified to post this on his real name (mail):
In soviet russia, prostitute fingers you? Wait...
10.22.2008 7:56pm
Daniel Chapman (mail):
For the first time in AGES, I'm glad for the comments section.
10.22.2008 8:05pm
Colin (mail):
For the first time in AGES, I'm glad for the comments section.

Agreed. I'd like to ask that the VC impose an immediate moratorium on all political topics, and focus exclusively on brothels, machete-related dethumbings, and Icelandic appelation taxation.

Actually, forget the tax thing. And the dismemberments.
10.22.2008 8:31pm
UW3L:
A silver machete?! Crime stories are way more amusing when criminals get creative about their weapons. Just think what an everyday tragic story this would have been if our young entrepreneur had simply gotten shot. I sure hope this creativity continues in post-Heller D.C. Two thumbs up for effort.
10.22.2008 9:17pm
BRM:
Why must you taunt Freddy Four Fingers with your two thumb salute?
10.22.2008 9:29pm
UW3L:
If I wanted to taunt him, I would bite my thumb at him, sir.
10.22.2008 9:31pm
Hoosier:
Finish the sentence contest now open: "You haven't lost a digit, you've gained a _______________ ."
10.22.2008 10:05pm
DC arriviste (mail):
In Washington Heights? Not bloody likely.

Nitpickers will note that Washington Heights is in Manhattan
10.22.2008 10:30pm
ChrisIowa (mail):

Nitpickers will note that Washington Heights is in Manhattan

Eastern provincialism.
10.22.2008 11:15pm
NickM (mail) (www):
My entry:
"You haven't lost a digit, you've gained a permanent place in Internet fame."

Nick
10.23.2008 12:30am
Bruce:
It's a new Sherlock Holmes mystery: The Adventure of the Pilferer's Thumb.

There was probably no hydraulic press involved, though.
10.23.2008 12:42am
Jay Myers:
First he was disarmed and then he was disthumbed. I be police caught him because he couldn't hitchhike his getaway.
10.23.2008 2:03am
David Warner:
"I guess it was a four finger discount."

OK wins the thread before it even starts. No fair!

Thankfully for Mr. Perez, she didn't work there.
10.23.2008 3:45am
Hoosier:
He's going to pay for this in bed, for the rest of his life. Any time he can't satisfy a woman, she'll just say: Well, you are just all thumbs tonight, ain't ya sugar?

Time to look for a good, secluded monastery.
10.23.2008 8:52am
Francis Marion (mail):

He's going to pay for this in bed, for the rest of his life. Any time he can't satisfy a woman, she'll just say: Well, you are just all thumbs tonight, ain't ya sugar?

Time to look for a good, secluded monastery.



At least he didn't lose his index fingers.
10.23.2008 10:28am
XON:
He's obviously going to have to scale back his activities -- he'll probably be reduced from swashbuckling the bordellos to merely palming the merchandise. . .
10.23.2008 10:29am
roger boas (mail):
vote "yes" on Prop. K.
10.23.2008 1:12pm